sunnuntai 31. maaliskuuta 2013

Introverted.

Introverted people appear to attract each other like magnets. This is what I've learned through the magic of internet, whenever I encounter new human beings I find interesting, they are most likely to be introverts. This comes quite clear in very early stages of communication, and it does not surprise me at all anymore, when someone tells me they feel the same way about people and crowds as I do. I get bored with people quite easily, although many might consider me as a rather social type. That is as long as these people have something interesting to say, something that can keep my attention. As soon as they lose that trail of thought, usually when the conversation moves from something personal and intimate to something like sports or cars or drinking or sex, those are almost always instant buzzkills for me. I have taught myself to be interested in people to some extent, and to make it even more complex, I think human psyche is on of my main interests, which makes all the people interesting as long as they are speaking honestly of their own experiences, thoughts, fears and dreams. When they talk about something more ordinary and vague, I notice myself becoming tired and feeling uneasy, because I can think of million better and more interesting places to be or things to do.

But still, online I seem to gather some sort of peer network of introverts, without even trying. I want to have real conversations, which usually counts out all those who appear to be unable of communicating with full words and full sentences. I know it makes me sound like an old fart, but having such a beautiful language as English as our lingua franca kinda demands to be treated well. I've read most of my Huxleys in English, just for the sake of the language used, and I recommend it to everyone able of reading in English. It's just something extraordinary, and I know it has influenced my writing a lot. But back to the peer network. I find it quite funny I have to collect a handful of people from all around the globe to feel even remotely connected with the rest of the mankind, especially these individuals I share my life with. Of course they are valuable in their own right, as intelligent human beings, that have their own motives and reasons to do whatever it is they do, but sometimes I feel like the only sober mind floating on a small raft in the ocean of liqour-soaked brain mass.

But I know there's still shitloads of people out there, who are built just like me. I am in no way unique, and it's a relief. I've managed to find quite a lot of them, and have mostly the internet to thank for it. So everytime I find myself posting the "I don't wanna live on this planet anymore" meme when someone acts selfishly or foolishly for simply not thinking things through in this virtual reality of ours, I need to remember the simple fact, that without this world wide web I would have probably offed myself a long time ago. That's how powerful this peer network of introverts really is. To know, that although there's no one like you around, there's still thousands of people like you somewhere else, and we still have some hope to accidentally encounter each other in the real world. It makes me want to live on this planet for a little longer after all.

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